More Bad Parenting…Ugh.

I’m the self-described “World’s Greatest Dad” and although I realize that’s completely inane, I do believe it’s a good approach to at least try to be the best parent, despite the loads of mistakes I’ll surely make along the way.  Parenting’s a bit tough for me since I’d never changed a diaper before my daughter was born AND I hadn’t logged more than a few minutes, at most, with infant care before becoming a Father.  It’s very much “learn as you go” and I think I’m making a decent go of it, but it IS something I have to constantly work at since the rules change EVERY SINGLE DAY, but that, paradoxically, is the one of the beauties of parenthood.

On the flipside, in the past week I overheard a couple of disturbing lines from other parents while I was out and about with my kids.  I consider what I overheard as some form of “benign abuse” (oxymorons, anyone?) and it does bother me that I’m making an effort to be a decent parent and others (both were Moms in this case) apparently look at parenting as some horrid job that they can’t wait to be over with.  I’ve heard other comments about what a “pain” kids are, etc, but when I hear it directly, I always say something like, “…so, why don’t you just kill your kid then?” or some similar insane suggestion.  These same parents are sure ready to receive compliments for their kids’ cuteness, etc, thus rounding out their complete hypocrisy.  That’s two reasons to hate them.

But I digress (my second occupation).  So, one woman, upon seeing her 4 year old drop her winter coat, said to her, “I don’t buy you expensive things to have you throw them on the floor.”  I felt like hitting her, but that, too, would be wrong and, hey, no one offered me any cash to do it.  And I thought of saying, “…and you also don’t buy expensive beauty treatments to end up ugly, but it happened”, but refrained.  Sheesh, poor kid.  Then today at a public kids’ play area I witnessed a Mom buying her whiny 6 year old a slice of pizza.  The kid was whining endlessly about something or other and the Mom rolled her eyes, looked at the cashier and said, “Jeez, he’s worse than a girl!”  Great job, MOM, way to spread your twisted views and stunt your kid’s intellectual growth.  Again I wanted to say something, but it’s like that line from Sunset Blvd.: “you don’t wake a sleepwalker.”  Anything I would have or could have said would have fallen on deaf ears and I would have come across as a jerk.  No one was in harm’s way, so I remained silent.

Since we can’t all live in the perfect BeLikeMichael world, maybe we CAN all do a little more to make life with kids more palatable.  Sure kids whine and throw fits, but hearing things like this is probably worse that hitting them (not that I hit my kids).  I wish these parents could deal with their kids a little more calmly and show a little more understanding of what they’re going through.  It ain’t easy being a kid, especially when you’re bombarded with TONS of rules and “no, this” and “no, that” ALL DAY LONG.  At least that’s how my kids are being raised; we give them a wide berth when it comes to fun and games and creativity and encourage them to be who they are, but they definitely have guidelines of what’s over the top.  When they act up, we try our best to deal with the issue at hand and sometimes they just have to “cry it out” if they don’t accept it.  We always try to support and comfort them and explain things to them, whether they understand or not.  It sounds easy being Donna Reed, but it takes a lot of patience and understanding.

The next time I hear something like the above, I’m going to say something.  However, I’m not going to be obnoxious about it and confront the bad parent, but maybe I’ll try to make light of the situation and say something like, “yeah…it’s rough on them, but they’re going through so many changes, and they sure are a blast, huh?”.  Then I’ll be told to shut up and mind my own business, but I’m OK with that.

Three words: Be Like Michael.